were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
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