im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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