this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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