He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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