gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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