he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
