You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
