i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize