If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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