First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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