The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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