You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
