I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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