no. you can't hotbox the world.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
