my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
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