Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
