people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize