so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
