covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
