Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
