No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
