Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize