i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
