I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Randomize
