Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
