Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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