They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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