Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
