come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
