You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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