you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
