So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize