Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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