i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
