I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
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