everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Is it because I queefed?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I think I sprained my soul last night
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
