Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
