Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
