drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I AM VODKA MAN
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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