honey bunches of taint.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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