What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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