Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
