physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
