I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize