how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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