i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
