Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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