I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
