so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize