the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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