it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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