he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
